June 24, 2013

The ICC, the Champions & the Trophy

The ICC Champions Trophy final was frustrating and enlightening at the same time. Here are a few lessons we gleaned from the match:

1. T20 is more exciting than ODIs

If the final would have been an ODI, one can almost entirely be sure that the match would not have been as exciting. The reason: the pitch was turning square. India had the bowlers to exploit it and England did not. The shorter match meant both teams had a chance and that’s what T20 does so well – it evens the playing field. A few wickets and many bad decisions by England gave the match to India but it was exciting (even if the quality wasn’t the highest) and that is the charm of T20.

2. The ICC doesn’t care about ODIs

A final of a major tournament and the ICC didn’t think they should have had a reserve day. A final in England – where it can rain at virtually any time – and the ICC didn’t think they should have had a reserve day. The official reason was that this is only window with England playing NZ in T20 on Tuesday. And that is why England lost the final of an ODI tourney via a T20 match. The ICC hasn’t even bothered to come out and admit that they got it really wrong. This was organisation at its worst but it also shows that the ICC only cares about making money. To make matters worse – only four players from the England ODI team are also part of the T20 team. One wonders what happened to the ICC’s powers of persuasion.

3. India rule ODIs – a format that seems to be fast dying

It’s probably the T20 effect – but it’s hard to watch ODIs. It’s neither non-stop action like T20, nor is it strategy-driven like Test matches. The constant tinkering with the format has meant that most fans are unaware of all the new rules and that can’t be good either. India have won the last two big ODI tournaments (the World Cup in 2011 and the Champions Trophy 2013) and if anything, it suits the BCCI’s interests to come up with a way to save the format.

4. As good a team England is in Tests, they are almost as good at choking as SA

We really don’t know if South Africa would choke in the final of a big ODI tournament because they never get there. England, on the other hand, are past masters of getting into the final and then losing: 1979 WC (to WI), 1987 WC (Aus), 1992 WC (Pak), 2004 ICC Champions Trophy (WI), 2013 ICC Champions Trophy (India). And given how long it’s taken them to get to this one, their next appearance in the final is a long time coming. It might allow them to get over their choking habit – after all which team loses when it needs 20 runs off 15 balls with 6 wickets in hand. They might say they were missing Kevin Pietersen but then India were missing many of their experienced stars too.

5. Rain changes the rules of the game

When the first three days of the third Test between England and Australia in 1971 were washed out officials decided to abandon the match and, instead, play a one-off one day game. When most of the day of the Champions Trophy final between India and England was drowned in multiple rain showers, the officials decided to play a T20 match instead. It was farcical but spare a thought for all the fans who spent hours at the ground, waiting for the rain to stop. It wouldn't have seemed quite as bad to them. Truth to be said, rain forces cricket to innovate and it often produces better results than the ICC Cricket Committees.

March 24, 2013

Economic Systems - Well Explained


SOCIALISM
You have 2 cows.
You give one to your neighbour

COMMUNISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and gives you some milk

FASCISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and sells you some milk

NAZISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both and shoots you

BUREAUCRATISM
You have 2 cows.
The State takes both, shoots one, milks the other, and then
throws the milk away

TRADITIONAL CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell one and buy a bull.
Your herd multiplies, and the economy
grows.
You sell them and retire on the income

ROYAL BANK OF SCOTLAND (VENTURE) CAPITALISM
You have two cows.
You sell three of them to your publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by
your brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax exemption
for five cows.
The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via an intermediary to a Cayman Island Company secretly owned by the majority shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed company.
The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option on one more. You sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States , leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release.
The public then buys your bull.

SURREALISM
You have two giraffes.
The government requires you to take harmonica lessons.

AN AMERICAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You sell one, and force the other to
produce the milk of four cows.
Later, you hire a consultant to analyse why
the cow has dropped dead.

A GREEK CORPORATION
You have two cows. You borrow lots of euros to build barns, milking sheds, hay stores, feed sheds,
dairies, cold stores, abattoir, cheese unit and packing sheds.
You still only have two cows.

A FRENCH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You go on strike, organise a riot, and block the roads, because you want three
cows.

A JAPANESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You redesign them so they are one-tenth the size of an ordinary cow and produce
twenty times the milk.
You then create a clever cow cartoon image called a Cowkimona and
market it worldwide.

AN ITALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows,
but you don't know where they are.
You decide to have lunch.

A SWISS CORPORATION
You have 5000 cows. None of them belong to you.
You charge the owners for storing them.

A CHINESE CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You have 300 people milking them.
You claim that you have full employment, and high bovine productivity.
You arrest the newsman who reported the real situation.

AN INDIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
You worship them.

A BRITISH CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Both are mad.

AN IRAQI CORPORATION
Everyone thinks you have lots of cows.
You tell them that you have none.
No-one believes you, so they bomb the ** out of you and invade your country.
You still have no cows, but at least you are now a Democracy.

AN AUSTRALIAN CORPORATION
You have two cows.
Business seems pretty good.
You close the office and go for a few beers to celebrate.

A NEW ZEALAND CORPORATION
You have two cows.
The one on the left looks very attractive...

February 14, 2013

Perfect Valentine

In the night, I hear 'em talk,
the coldest story ever told
Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul to a woman so heartless...
How could you be so heartless?

How could you be so, cold as the winter wind when it breeze, yo
Just remember that you talkin' to me though
You need to watch the way you talkin' to me, yo

I mean after all the things that we've been through
I mean after all the things we got into
Hey yo, I know of some things that you ain't told me
Hey yo, I did some things but that's the old me

And now you wanna get me back and you gon' show me
So you walk around like you don't know me
You got a new friend,I got homies
But in the end it's still so lonely

How could you be so Dr. Evil, you bringin' out a side of me that I dont know...
I decided we weren't gon' speak so
Why we up 3 A.M. on the phone

Why does she be so mad at me fo'
Homie I dont know, she's hot and cold
I won't stop, won't mess my groove up
'Cause I already know how this thing go

You run and tell your friends that you're leaving me
They say that they don't see what you see in me
You wait a couple months then you gon' see
You'll never find nobody better than me

Talkin', talkin', talkin', talk
Baby let's just knock it off
They don't know what we been through
They don't know 'bout me and you
So I got something new to see
And you just gon' keep hatin' me
And we just gon' be enemies
I know you can't believe
I could just leave it wrong
And you can't make it right
so I'm gon' take off tonight
Into the night....

In the night, I hear 'em talk,
the coldest story ever told
Somewhere far along this road, he lost his soul to a woman so heartless...
How could you be so heartless?
Oh... How could you be so heartless?